Fragile

Its just some practical wisdom.

There are things in myself that are more fragile than i tend to respect, and other areas that i have strength in that i often discount. It's so hard to accurately perceive yourself.

I love this verse in pslams. "He redeems my soul in safety from the battle that i wage, for many are arrayed against me."

He is my redeemer. There is a story to be lived out, redemption being the centralized theme. What is broken is to be restored. This is the good news. The gospel. Jesus being glorified. He redeems our lives from the pit (psalm 103). He is active in my story as i struggle to discern what is it he has for me in this day.

"A crucial part of fleshing out our liberation in Christ means allowing Him to fill the empty places in our lives." Beth Moore knew a thing or two about the process of God redeeming the fragile parts of her life. The redemption of my past isn't channeled through a reconciled, renewed or new relationships. Redemption of this past comes from full satisfaction in Christs fullness. From being in the vine, tasting and seeing that He is good.  That's a shift for me.

I'm being renewed day by day. And it's in this i rejoice. This seemingly helpless story that isn't amounting to much at present isn't being wasted. It's being renewed. [doesn't that sound far nicer].

The Lord wants to satisfy my soul - one of the Hebrew words for satisfy is literally to fill or accomplish the filling of something empty...the act of replenishment as well as satisfaction. He won't fill it with the ultimate 'love' story that involves my own Ryan Reynolds and white dress, but rather with Himself whose love, as David writes, is better than life.

To replenish and satisfy the empty fragile parts of me with Himself.

I smile as i type this, knowing that my God is up to so much more in my life than i am aware. Each day start i look more and more like a woman, but looking into the inner courtyard of my heart, i am a total child. But perhaps this is the way its meant to be.

But oh my divided heart. The Lord is moving me forward, but my heart still yearns for parts of the past. And it's in these moments that melodies and lyrics capture the feelings better than naked words ever could.